Some Gyani gave me the secret to lose weight, I'd like to share it with all of u if u promise not to pass it on further :
a) Give up good food
b) Exercise
Wow, I could give up my one of my 47 jackets to know this secret and I’m passing it on to u all free mei !!….yeh ehsaan samgajh lena
I just remembered a black and white movie’s dialogue “ zindagi mei kuch pane ke liye kadi mehnat aur lagan chahiye”
Arrey, market mei milti hai kya lagan aur mehnat ? Should I go to a supermarket and say “Bhaiyaji 3 kilo mehnat and 4 kilo lagan pack ker do ....magar thoda discount dena..bulk mei khareed rahe hoon “
So considering I have no mehnat and lagan with me, I am set on a mission to lose weight.
So while I am binging on my cheese burger, pizza with extra cheese and diet coke, I am thinking of losing 5 kgs
My fat friends tell me I look fine but I know that say just so they don’t look any fatter in front of me ..(God bless these green-eyed girls )
So I decided to go on a no cereal diet (bright ideas come with cheese in your stomach ..mark my words) ..so no rice, roti, bread. I thought that this would be easy as I could eat tikkas, stir fried veggies, salads, cheese platter etc
After 10 days, the weighing scale did not show any difference but my jeans were not tight any longer , they were comfortable…so I was happy and had to treat myself.
So that night it was Penne, garlic bread and brownie with icecream ..lovely !!
Next morning those jeans were still comfortable so lunch was mysore plain dosa and dahi vada. ..my jeans were still ok
Obvoisly now its time to send those jeans for washing !!
3 days later, those jeans were tighter…TIGHTER THAN BEFORE ..
So to lose the weight which I had put on, I decided to go on a no cereal diet again …suddenly I realize that chocolate is not cereal, so why not indulge!
5 days later, huh..same story..NO WEIGHT LOSS !!
What does a person like me who is fat, has no mehnat and lagan do to lose weight.
a) I run backwards when I see a gym.
b) I am on a good food diet all the time.
c) I always have diet coke (calorie conscious me )
d) I get high on good food (I get into my true element with good food..its strange but true). So de-stressing means gorging
e) I like venture into any new restaurant in the city .
f) I pray to god every night “Oh god, thank you for this lovely day and the good food. Please bless me so that any food which is calorie’s galore does not react on me and does not form fat lipids.
Please make me the thin without giving up food and without exercise.
Amen …Oh and also world peace”
After my prayer, god has has put a penalty on all things we enjoy in life. Either we suffer we suffer in soul or we get fat.
I have a great diet. You're allowed to eat anything you want, but you must eat it with fat people.
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6 comments:
u called me fat. i'm not commenting
Hehehe... you sound like a true Zee's friend :) (Zee, in case you see this, I'm not calling you fat!)
now u know y i don't go out with u .. hahaha..
yeh 47 se kya pyaar hai tujhe.. 2 saalo se 47 jackets kari ja rahi hai ..number barha ya ghatha.. kuch tho kar...hahahahahahahahahhaha...
p.s. can't say i didn't warn u of my commenting ways..lol ..
are you calling all 5 of us fat!!!!!!!!???? hmmmmm..... loll
will you really give up of your 47 jackets... ??
Zee:- U're not fat, U r just kilos of fun :)
Still searhing: Thanks for agreeing that Zee is not fat.
Nim: when i buy a jacket, i give one away to the salvation army. So its like buy one, throw one.
Closet Constraint u c
Anisha: No u guys r not fat. we need to make friends with fat people so that we feel slim and trim
jainy u suck!
searching, pls to tell why why why jainy sounds like me??? the fat bit isnt it isnt it isnt it???
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